Rear Ended 

Rear Ended

So here's the skinny ...

Driving the BIG WHITE MINIVAN through town to find some shitake mushrooms for some killer soup.
Enter the right turn lane but stop to allow the traffic turning left in front of me to finish turning (they have the right away light).
BAM! Dude runs right into the back of the BIG WHITE MINIVAN.
Knocks the wind out of me - he comes to the window "Do you have a cell phone?"
I call 911 - they are very nice "Someone is on the way".
Police arrive, we move to a nearby parking lot to disect what has just happened.
"What happened?"
"He ran into the back of my BIG WHITE MINIVAN"
"I didn't see her."
Questioning face "You didn't see her? Ma'am, how long were you there in your BIG WHITE MINIVAN?"
"Oh, 30 seconds to a minute."
"And you say you didn't see her?"
"No, I'm sorry, I just didn't notice her BIG WHITE MINIVAN." (sitting at a complete stop, brake light ON, turn signal ON)

So seriously, this is like a double yarmukal award.
Maybe I need to paint like bright orange racing stripes all the way around my new car...
At least the nice doctor yesterday gave me some killer pain pills.